


The Dawn Will Come

by I_Am_Your_Dentist



Series: Reversal AU [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: AU, M/M, Mage!Cullen, Role-Reversal, templar!Anders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-31
Updated: 2015-05-31
Packaged: 2018-04-02 05:53:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4048663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_Am_Your_Dentist/pseuds/I_Am_Your_Dentist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Role-reversal fic. Cullen is a mage who grew up in the Ferelden Circle. Anders is a templar with a soft spot for mages.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Dawn Will Come

The first thing Cullen became aware of was something cool and wet pressing against his forehead. A cloth, he surmised from the sound of trickling water as it was wrung out. He could feel grimy sweat being washed away from his temples, where hair clung to his skin, a gentle and tender motion.

The second thing was that he ached. Everywhere. From his throbbing head to his aching toes, his entire body was in pain. He groaned, moving against the cool cloth, searching for some kind of relief and finding none except gentle fingers against his cheek.

"Cullen?" The voice was familiar, but with his head throbbing, it was difficult to focus. "Are you awake?"

"Hurts..." His voice came out raspy, throat like sandpaper. The fingers moved away, and he nearly cried out in anguish. The one comfort he had, and it was being taken away? He was relieved a moment later when a cool glass of water was pressed to his lips. He grasped the glass to tip it back faster, choking and spluttering a bit as it went down his throat faster than he could swallow.

"Easy now. Drink it slow." The words were chiding but gentle, long fingers running soothingly through his curly hair. The glass was pressed to his lips again as he nodded, forcing himself to take slow sips. Slowly, the burning in his throat eased.

When the glass was set aside he reached for his blanket to press it over his face and block out the light. It was unbearably bright; even his closed lids could do little to stem the harsh glare. "What happened?" Voice muffled, Cullen only hoped the words got through to the person with the voice that he trusted. His memory was muddled at best, flashes of green and various animals flitting through his mind before vanishing once again. None of it made any sense.

"Your Harrowing." A hand reached out to pat his. "Congratulations. You passed."

Cullen froze as memories began rushing back. Being summoned to the Harrowing chamber. Entering the Fade. A demon...trying to tempt him, but he resisted. He was alive.

Slowly, he lowered the blanket, wincing as he forced his eyelids apart. "Anders..."

The templar smiled and squeezed his hand. Cullen had never seen the older man look so tired, but the relief and happiness on his face was evident. "Happy 19th birthday, Cullen."

It took a moment for those words to sink in, but when they did, he sat bolt upright. He regretted the action immediately, his head throbbing violently and the world rushing around him. He cradled it as he stared incredulously at the grinning templar. "It…it can't be! That would mean I've been asleep..."

"Five days." Anders tried to push him back down, but Cullen batted his hand away. He was feeling stronger by the minute, and suddenly the idea of spending even a minute more in this bed made his skin crawl.

"Five days...." He ran a hand through his hair, grimacing at the grease clinging to his curls. He had heard that the Harrowing often left mages weak, but he had no idea it would be so bad. "Have you been here the whole time?"

"When I could be. I had my duties to attend to, but there was always someone watching you." 'In case you turned into a demon' went unsaid, but Cullen heard it anyway. It was the only reason anyone in the Circle would bother watching over a mage. Certainly not for concern over his well-being. Well, anyone except Anders. He was special.

"I'm really glad you made it through," Anders said quietly. His smile dropped from his face, a distant look in his eyes. "They wanted me to...if you had gotten possessed, I was to strike the final blow. I don't think I could have done it to be completely honest."

Cullen laid a hand on Anders' shoulder. So weird to see him without his signature armor, dressed instead in a simple tunic and breeches that the templars wore in their off time. Generally, they stayed on their own floor then, preferring for the mages not to see them as anything but walking weapons. 

"I wouldn't have been myself. I would rather die than be possessed by some demon who wants to use me to hurt others." He had had nightmares about being possessed before, about looking on helplessly while he killed his friends. He never wanted to experience that.

He opened his mouth to say something else, when he was interrupted by a ferocious growl in the vague vicinity of his stomach. There was a brief moment of silence before both men erupted into giggles.

"I guess we should get you something to eat," Anders chuckled, wiping the mirthful tears from his eyes. Cullen nodded and threw the blankets aside, only hesitating when he felt a breeze in places he definitely shouldn't be.

"Anders."

"Hm?"

"...I'm naked."

"Yes." Anders' amusement seemed to increase, his grin spreading the crinkle around his blue eyes. "If you think you feel gross now, imagine how you would if you'd been sweating into your robes for five days."

Cullen quickly pulled the blanket over his lap, his face bright red. He found he couldn’t meet the other man’s eyes. "Did you, um...did you…undress me?"

"No, I thought I'd let Wynne get a peek; she gets so few pleasures in her old age." Anders rolled his eyes. "It's not like I haven't seen it before, Cullen. You've been here since you were seven." He reached behind him and grabbed a set of clean robes, tossing them onto Cullen's lap. "Here. If you’re going to be a big baby about it, I’ll wait outside while you get dressed.”

Cullen didn't look up until he heard the click of the door closing. Logically, he knew it wasn't a big deal and that Anders had seen him naked before. There wasn’t exactly much privacy in the Circle, and he was almost constantly being walked in on in various state of undress. Modesty wasn’t a luxury he could afford to have. But, still…he couldn't stop thinking of the older man undressing him and tucking him in under the blankets to keep him warm. Those long-fingered hands pressing against his skin as they laid him down.

He pulled the robe on and shook his head. It wasn't a big deal. It wasn't. Now if only he could convince his shaking hands of that.

The walk down to the mess hall was silent, but amiably so. Cullen felt almost like a small celebrity with how many people were congratulating him on his Harrowing. People he barely knew were patting him on the back, grinning proudly. He had made it through his time as an apprentice. He was a real mage now.

"I talked with Irving about getting you some time off." Anders’ tone was easy as he loaded the small metal tray in his hands with food. "He agreed that under the circumstances, it might be best if you take some time to rest.”

"But that means I've got to wait to start training on the higher-level magics." Cullen's face fell into a pout. His voice dangerously bordered on whiny. "Come on, Anders, you know I've been looking forward to those since I was ten!"

"And you can still look forward to them when you don't look like death warmed over." The older man shoved the tray at Cullen, fixing him with a pointed glare. "After everything that's happened, trust me, you’ll thank me for the down time.”

"Oh, what's going to happen? I'll burn the whole Circle?" He led Anders to a small benched table and sat down, staring moodily at his food. "What if I just...what if I just read about them, and then that way I'm at least still learning?"

"Whatever you think is best." Anders shrugged one shoulder and stole a nug leg from the tray. "But you should know, if I find you trying to cast, I do have the authority to tie you to the bed."

Cullen's face felt like a furnace as he glanced away. "I'm not...I...fine. Whatever." That image was burned into his brain now. Himself, tied to the bed, completely helpless while Anders moved closer with a predatory gaze. He picked at his food as he avoided the older man’s stare.

"I'm just kidding," Anders said gently. "If you really think you're ready to begin your higher level training, I won't stop you. I just thought it might be best. You really had everyone worried.”

Cullen hesitated. He did still ache all over, though it was a dull throb now and easy to ignore. He had inspected himself for marks earlier, but there were none. All his pain was mental, and that might be enough to make his casting sloppy. Maybe Anders was right.

"Fine," he muttered. "I'll take a few days off. But you'd better make sure I'm not bored."

"Perish the thought." Anders grinned and dug into his food, eagerly picking the bone clean. He ate like a man starved, gnawing at the bone for any bits he might have missed.

Cullen watched him in fascination. "Did you eat at all while I was out? Or sleep? You don't look any better than I feel." The dark circles under the templar’s eyes stood out harshly against his pale skin. He looked ready to collapse any minute.

"Uh, well..." Anders laughed nervously. "Between templar duties and checking on you, it just didn't seem a high priority."

"Anders," the younger mage chided. "You could have at least had someone bring you something."

"Everyone else was busy.”

"Anders..." He sighed. "You know, if I had been asleep for much longer, you could have wasted away."

"I'd have preferred that than anyone else being in there if you changed," he said quietly. "There's techniques to save someone from possession without killing them. Most templars don't use them because they're slow and dangerous. I know nobody else would have, if you had..."

The silence that hung between them was heavy, and Cullen reached out to grasp the older man's wrist. "I'm fine, Anders. See? No demons here." He smiled faintly. "No demons ever. The day I let myself get possessed is the day Irving puts on a dress and dances the Remigold in the foyer.”

Anders snorted. “Now there’s a mental image I’ll never get rid of.” He kept his gaze trained on Cullen’s hand, still grasping his wrist. "Most people don't 'let' themselves get possessed." The smile that followed was obviously forced, but Cullen chose not to comment. Anders' templar training had taught him to look for demons from every angle. Nothing he said would ever matter, in the end.

They ate together until they were full, then wandered off to the baths. This time of day, the templars were either busy with their duties or relaxing in their own quarters, and the mages were in training. They had the massive stone room to themselves. Cullen didn't particularly want to strip down in front of Anders again, so he moved behind a rock wall for some privacy. His skin was already crawling with sweat and grime; he relished the thought of washing it all away.

As the bath was filled, he secretly used a heat spell to make the water steam. No need to suffer a lukewarm bath, after all, even if Anders wouldn't approve of him using magic. Cullen slipped into the bath with a sigh, letting his eyes slide shut as the hot water eased the ache in his muscles.

“So, you never told me what you wanted for your birthday.”

Cullen shrugged, then realizing Anders couldn’t see him, said, “Maybe a new staff? I should probably have a new one now that I’m not an apprentice anymore, you know?”

“They’ll probably issue you a new one, and a weapon is not a birthday gift.” The amusement in Anders’ voice was evident. “Come on, I can always ask for leave and go to Redcliffe. They’ve got some great stuff there. Food, books, clothes…sky’s the limit.”

“No...I mean, there’s nothing else I even want.” Least of all did he want Anders leaving, even if only for a few days. The thought of the templar not being around gave him an unpleasant knot in his stomach. “Just the staff. A nice one. If you want it to be special, I dunno, make it dragonbone or something.”

“Just how much do you think I get paid?” Anders laughed. “If you’re not going to be helpful, I’ll just think of something on my own.”

Cullen shrugged, smirking a bit as he heard Anders climbing into his own bath. The older man was probably just as thrilled as he was to bathe. He took such pride in his appearance, and especially his long blond hair, it was surprising that he had let himself go for so long.

Then again, thinking about the why...Anders had sacrificed a lot to watch over him and keep him safe. Though there was an eleven-year age gap between them, Cullen had always considered the templar his best friend. Even when he was a child and dragged to the Circle for the first time, Anders had always been so kind to him. He was just eighteen then. Only a year younger than he was now, though at the time he had felt so much older. He was almost like a big brother, always watching out for him and protecting him as best he could.

Cullen dipped down below the water to submerge his head, coming up mere seconds later with his curls dripping. He reached for the soap to lather his hands, his gaze distant as he rubbed the suds into his hair.  
Anders had always been there. He wasn't like the other Templars, who used fear and manipulation and looked at them like they were dirt under their boots. He trusted and cared for mages. But above all others, he trusted and cared for Cullen the most. He wondered what was so special about him.

"Anders?" His voice echoed off the stone walls, making him wince. Much louder than he intended.

"Hm?" The older man's voice was smooth and low, his relaxation evident.

"Do you really have nothing better to do than...than hang around with me all day?" His face went hot and it had nothing to do with the bath. "I mean...am I really that special to you?"

There was a long pause. With every second that ticked by, Cullen grew more and more afraid of what Anders' answer would be. Logically, he knew, Anders had to value him. But thinking it and hearing it were two different things. He wanted Anders to say it. Maybe then it would explain why he thought about him so much, why he always wanted to be near him, why the sound of his voice made his stomach do somersaults.

"Well...” The sudden intonation made him jump, his nerves on edge. “I needed to eat and bathe too. I'm sure you noticed the smell." An easy answer with a light tone. A joke. But it wasn't the one he wanted to hear.  
Cullen forced a laugh. "Yeah. That is true." He felt like he had been punched in the gut. Hot tears pricked at the corner of his eyes, but he refused to let them fall. What kind of child was he, to cry over something so insignificant? Anders was his friend. That he thought him special was a given. What more did he really want the older man to say?

He finished washing and dressed quickly in his robes. Suddenly, he wanted nothing more than to be alone. “I'm going back to my room." He didn't wait for Anders to answer before rushing out.

This was stupid.

He was stupid.

The next day, he threw himself into his studies, hoping against hope this feeling would go away


End file.
